“Loving speech is an important aspect of practice. We say only loving things. We say the truth in a loving way, with nonviolence. This can only be done when we are calm. When we are irritated, we may say things that are destructive. So when we feel irritated, we should refrain from saying anything. We […]
“WE found out by text message. “Don’t get on the plane. The birth mother is unsure.” It was 6 a.m. in December in Seattle. A quiet stillness — the kind only possible after a month of winter rain and gloom — threatened to envelop us. We began our vigil, calling the Louisiana social worker not
NYT’s Modern Love: Three Mothers, One Bond Read More »
What’s needed in these times of diminished trust, are positive trust building “dos.” Want more trusting relationships at work? Here are five simple trust building dos that will enhance work relationships, no matter your role: 1. Operate with respect. Respect is an essential trust building component. If you don’t offer respect to others, why would someone
Five Trust Building Do’s from PsychologyToday.com Read More »
Many people have asked me recently how to be present for their loved ones, how to listen well, and what to say in response to some very challenging feelings. First, know that it does take real effort, skill, and patience to sit and be present with another in distress. Our impulse is to help, to
Listen Compassionately, No Need to Solve Right Away Read More »
A nice, short piece from the NYT about what contributes to the successes and the complexities of couples counseling. And the challenges it poses to therapists attempting to do it well. Does Couples Therapy Work? “WE’VE all had that horrible experience: you throw a party or invite a couple over for dinner, and they start
Does Couples Therapy Work? Read More »
Beware: Individual Therapy Can Harm Your Marriage How a therapist’s error led her to better treatment methods. Published on February 24, 2012 by Susan Heitler, Ph.D. in Resolution, Not Conflict
Beware: Individual Therapy Can Harm Your Marriage Read More »
Here’s a set of questions to help you figure out if your therapist is giving you what you need to end up with a truly strong and loving partnership.
How Effective is Your Marriage Therapy? Read More »
The Generous Marriage By TARA PARKER-POPE December 8, 2011, 7:00 AM “Men and women with the highest scores on the generosity scale were far more likely to report that they were “very happy” in their marriages. The benefits of generosity were particularly pronounced among couples with children. Among the parents who posted above-average scores for marital
Generosity Essential to Fulfilling Relationships Read More »
Does Cooperation Really Matter in Marriage? Learning cooperative marriage skills predicts a lasting marriage. Published on November 10, 2011 by Susan Heitler, Ph.D. in Resolution, Not Conflict
Does Cooperation Really Matter in Marriage? Read More »
A few weeks ago, I had the honor of officiating my cousin’s wedding in Baltimore. It was on the sixth anniversary of my brother’s wedding, at which I also officiated. In preparing the ceremony, one that I wrote from scratch with the help of my cousin and his fiancee, I asked friends and family what
Notes on Officiating Read More »
